Maybe I'm spreading myself too thin or maybe the month of November has been a total crapfest (most def.), but I'm totally failing at this National Novel Writing Month. EPIC. FAIL.
I'm so behind it's not even funny and to top it all off: I cheated. You're not supposed to bring in a half-finished manuscript into the contest. You're supposed to start from scratch. Well, screw you Nanowrimo! I'm not going to start something else when I've been trying to write this darn thing all of my adult life.
I had a mini pity party yesterday. I was staring at my computer unsure about where to start, what to do, who to be. I want to finish editing pictures. I want to go outside and look at the world through my camera. I want to hop on that treadmill that has been noticebly absent from my life. I want. I want. I want. Then, Scott called and started saying these lines from Family Guy that he always tells me:
"Stewie Griffin: [voice pitch increases with every sentence] How you, uh, how you coming on that novel... you working on, huh? Got a big, uh, big stack of papers there? Got a, got a, got a nice little, nice little story you're working on there...your big novel you’ve been working on for three years. Huh? Got a, got a compelling protagonist, huh? Got an obstacle for him to overcome, huh? Little story brewing there... working on... working on that for quite some time, huh? Yeah, talking about that three years ago, huh? Been working on that the whole time? Nice little, uh, narrative--beginning, middle, and end? Some friends become enemies, some enemies become friends? Yeah? At the end your, uh, main character is, uh, richer for the experience? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? You got a-- [voice returns to mormal] no, no, you deserve some time off."
I laugh whenever I think about it. I told my friend Lissette about that one day and she found this card in Hallmark that has that first line. I have it up on my bulletin board to keep me motivated. It was that call from Scott, a subsequent call from Lissette where she let me vent my frustrations and the date night Mike and I have every Thrusday (Bones, The Office and some take out), that made me clear my mind. I need to stop worrying about everything and just do it. In the words of Yoda: Do or do not, there is no try.
Yes, I just quoted Yoda.
I went to bed with a renewed purpose. I set my alarm for 4:00 a.m....you read that correctly, 4 AM. When I woke up, I got to work. I stopped worrying about story and just wrote. After an hour and a half of writing, I got down 2,001 words upping my total to 21,676. Damn, skippy! I feel encouraged and elated. I'm freakin' pumped!
This weekend and our trip to New York will hopefully bring on more words. I may not reach the goal of 50,000 or finsh the novel my month's end but half the battle is getting up and just doing it. That's what I'm going to do. Like Dory said in Finding Nemo, "Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. What do we do? We swim. We swim." Smart fish, that one.
Lots of exciting happenings in my world coming up. I won't be a lame-o blogger anymore, promise. I'm going to be posting pictures from my maternity shoot, Lissette's bridal shower, pictures taken with Olga my Holga, my gratitude list and telling many a random tale.
Here is a neat polaroid I took on our way to the movies last Sunday.