Gratitude

Some of you were confused by my previous post, which I just deleted (I didn't want the bad juju to sully my turf.) Scott went so far as to text me last night, "What's up with your HS facebook blog post?" It was all just a little poopiness on my part and the need to vent.

I won't lie, it's been a tough week. And, as always, I have let outside forces affect how I feel and my level of stress. This obviously needs to stop. In the middle of all that, though, I was able to find a silver lining. Right before I went to bed I wrote my morning pages (they were moved to night pages because I could just not get up early enough this week). I tried to find the things I was grateful for despite the tears and the aggravation. Here is my entry:

Thursday, November 5, 2009  Day 150*

Another day that started with so much promise and, despite a dicey middle, ended up with so much more. It was not quite what I pictured my day to be but it's fine, it's bearable because at the end of the day, when I can barely keep my head up from the stress headache, I can crawl into bed with him and will it all away. And while I'm cozy and safe and loved, I can think of all the good things that did happen and all those things I'm grateful for:

- The smile and wave from the janitor at 6:30 in the morning. The fact that he kept smiling even as he rolled his cart away. Thanking the universe for genuine people. 
- The way my students crowd around my desk before the bell rings trying to tell me this, that or the other.
- How one of my old students has found a love a reading to rival my own. He's on his fourth book in two weeks and has the ladies lined around the block.
- Flowers on my desk.
- Agreeing that Corona flip flops are a tad white trash.
- The ability to vent to a friend.
- The healing powers of my mom's hugs.
- Yani helping me grade, hearing me out, siding with me--always.
- Fixing my dad a sandwich.
- My grandmother's voice.
- Knowing tomorrow's Friday, thank the heavens.
- The sound of the door when he walks in.
- Home.

*How many days straight I've written my morning pages. TOP THAT!

~

And with that, a picture:

The road looks like the ocean!