Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Phase I

Anyone who knows me can tell you that I'm not a restful person. I exhaust people. In fact, I exhaust myself. I don't know why I always have this constant need to be moving and doing things, but I do. Take this blog, for instance. I love this blog. I started it in the summer because I have a little hamster in my brain working overtime with all of all the thoughts that are spinning around in there. It all has to go someplace. Why not here? Though I love this blog, it's hard work to make something enjoyable to read (I hope). It's also hard work to be a good teacher, wife, photographer, writer, in-shape person (not that I am. I just threw that out there to see if it sticks). The point is that I'm just about to make things a little harder (that's what she said). This afternoon, before sitting down to write this, I submitted my application for my masters in photography. I kissed 100 bucks good bye, said a little prayer and began the process of a new future. Gah.


What school, you ask? Academy of Art University. My wonderful, so-talented-it-makes-my-head-spin sister-in-law Kris is getting her MFA in Illustration there as I write this. She is living the life in San Francisco. I'm totally stealing her thunder by applying there, but she is loving that school and I can take the whole thing online. How great is that?

I can't just be content running around like a lunatic. I need to add school to the mix so that I can really go insane. The thing is that if I want to take this whole photography thing to the next level (how cliche is that phrase? Seriously?), I know that I need to learn a whole lot more than what I know. Will I stress out? Absolutely. Does this have the potential of pushing me over the edge? Without a doubt. Is it something that I want to do? No question 'bout it!

Now commences Phase II: Portfolio and  Letter of intent submisson as well as that little thing called Tuition. How the flip am I going to pay for this? Future Elaine will have to worry about that.

Can I just be an insecure girl for a second?  You guys, what if I don't get accepted? What if I do? What if I completely suck and they hate my pictures? What if people are so much more advanced than me and I feel like I'm back in middle school taking pictures with my neon pink camera like this one?
I'm not saying this for reassurance. These are just things that I'm thinking. Maybe if I get these worries out in this forum, I don't have to carry them around with me and they won't ruin my mojo.
So what do you think? Am I crazy? That's a dumb question. Am I crazier than normal for doing this? Sound off in the comments.

Today's picture of the day is one that will probably earn me a stern lecture but makes me happy to no end. If someone were ever to ask me to define my relationship with Mike, all I would have to do is show them this picture. This is the perfect snapshot of who were are:

4 comments:

Yanelle Garcia October 14, 2009 at 6:14 PM  

It's spelled "tuition"...not "tution".

'grats.

Anonymous October 14, 2009 at 6:22 PM  

Go for it cuz!!!!

PS: The lady in the wheel chair rocks!!! -El primo

Anonymous October 15, 2009 at 9:37 AM  

Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? Of course not.
SOOOO... DONT WORRY, BE HAPPY.

DO WHAT YOU LOVE, BUT DO IT WITH PURPOSE. GOD bless. hja

Unknown October 15, 2009 at 3:56 PM  

As said in the movie Waterboy..."you CAN do it!"
....And btw, there's tons of government help for those looking to go back to school. Go to Whitehouse.gov, look for the issues tab, then go to education. My co-worker was telling me they have a stimulus package for education. I don't know what the details are but I'm sure you can get some kind of government help with that. YOU GO GIRL!

All Pictures © Elaine Palladino 2009

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